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Solitude

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A look around me and the solitude abounds.. I see faces.. I hear voices with the thickening of the crowd, my insecurity deepens. A smile, a laugh, a word spoken, all unmeant, unfelt, untouched !  A thousand miles away I roam lost in thought, lost in my 'i wish's and 'if only's. What do i wish for ? What do I lack ?  What would complete me ? I have no idea. Unaware if the fact of lacking something appeals to me or the thought of finding it. The loneliness continues to grow.. days turn into weeks and weeks into months and I'm stuck in a place still unfamiliar..still unappealing. I resolve.. I resolve to wash away the cloud in my eyes, take a fresh look around me and change my pattern of thinking. Did it work ? Apparently not. Everything's just the same, the same scenes, same people, magnified emptiness. Feels like a vacuum has grown within me, Solitude has turned physical, Like a balloon of air stuck in my chest where something else should have been. My mind
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A Wish Upon A Dream

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                                                     A dream dream't or a fantasy unmasked. I wish I never know. A world of Life, of bliss untold. Sparkling eyes.. Charming smiles.. Magical hands ! A prayer of I Love You's.. Lyrics spoken. A wish upon a shooting star with my Love not distances afar. A Kiss upon the cheek, Priceless words he speaks. The sky looks like my wedding palace, adorned with lights and a honeymoon. The birds fly past me singing me a tune, "Here comes the bride.. here she comes !" The trees blow me a gentle breeze, I fall into an embrace,  spinning on my partner's feet ! I have myself a crush !  Love they call it.. what is love ? If this is love then I'm dreaming !  Flaring skirts..heels clicking.. Glasses clanking..spirits mounting. Its a celebration ! Look around you.. the people you see, the voices you hear, the movements you catch, All part of an organised plan.. A plan made in festive spirits.. to celebrate,
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Wanderer

I'm lost in the world I created myself Lost by the choices I've made, the people I've chosen and the ones I've let go of As days pass I find myself going deeper, deeper into a world of darkness The thought of a new day excites me, a change of scenario entices I yearn to catch a glimpse of the sun through this maze I long to hear a creature of nature and know I'm not alone I wander, I keep walking..days turn into weeks, weeks into months and here I am still wandering.. And as I walk, I learn. I've learnt to sharpen tools that once were blunt I've learnt to strengthen my defenses and protect myself My armor only grows stronger. My shield has never been more fierce. And when I lay awake at night and ponder My mind is filled with questions and I wonder, Who am I really running from What am I really defending myself against The more my defenses grow the more invisible I become. I now lay still and wait I wait for that one person who will see through my invisibil
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