Solitude
A look around me and the solitude abounds.. I see faces.. I hear voices with the thickening of the crowd, my insecurity deepens. A smile, a laugh, a word spoken, all unmeant, unfelt, untouched ! A thousand miles away I roam lost in thought, lost in my 'i wish's and 'if only's. What do i wish for ? What do I lack ? What would complete me ? I have no idea. Unaware if the fact of lacking something appeals to me or the thought of finding it. The loneliness continues to grow.. days turn into weeks and weeks into months and I'm stuck in a place still unfamiliar..still unappealing. I resolve.. I resolve to wash away the cloud in my eyes, take a fresh look around me and change my pattern of thinking. Did it work ? Apparently not. Everything's just the same, the same scenes, same people, magnified emptiness. Feels like a vacuum has grown within me, Solitude has turned physical, Like a balloon of air stuck in my chest where something else should have been. My mind